Will or Won't Power

"Using stubbornness to your Advantage"

Has anyone ever called you stubborn? Would you describe yourself that way? If so, you may be in luck when it comes to making positive changes.

Some people find themselves in trouble a lot because of a personality characteristic that they call stubbornness. You’ve heard of will power. Well, stubbornness is a kind of “won't power.” It causes you to dig in and refuse to budge, and sometimes it drives other people crazy.

But, as Roger and McWilliams point out in their book, Life 101, “Just as fear is also excitement, stubbornness is also determination. It’s simply a matter of shifting the focus from ‘won't power’ back to ‘will power.’ Rather than, ‘I won't get fat,’ change it to ‘I will keep a healthy, slim body.’ Rather than, ‘I won't be around people who don’t support my efforts,’ say ‘I will seek out people who help me do what I want to do in life.’ It’s just a matter of finding the positive opposite and focusing on that, rather than aligning yourself with a negative. Stubbornness, if you use it to advantage, will stand you in good stead when it comes to achieving your goals and living out your values.”

Imagine yourself stubbornly refusing to accept anything but the best in life. Imagine yourself stubbornly holding on to your program of self-improvement and personal growth no matter what. You see what I mean. If you shift your energy from stubbornness to determination, you’ll be doing yourself a big favor.

The great news is this works in all areas of your life, this “trait” has been known to run through out my family, my grandmother was widowed at the age of 32 with 5 children, in those days there were no Benefits, so she had to work hard. My mum had a terrible accident when she was 16 in a paper bag factory her hand got caught in a machine and only through the “stubboness” of her mum refusing to have her hand amputated did she keep it and although never fully recovered the use of it, my mum managed to work, knit, sew all her life. I was taught from an early age to stick at things, see them through, so when there have been times in my own life when I have needed to stick my own heels in and dig down deep inside for that determination, it has always been there.

Just this last weekend, I volunteered in a moment of madness to participate in the 15km walk for charity around Torrmendo lake, although I train regularly walking distances is not in my usual programme. Sunday came, thankfully not raining, got to the starting point and off we go a nice group of us. No sooner had we started but found the ground beneath us was far from solid!!! This is the first walk I have done with diving boots, the soil was wet and heavy mud.

On we went, up slight hills, sliping and squelching along, but the views were amazing and the people I met along the way were friendly and the time seemed to pass easily. By the half way mark I was beginning to feel the full on my muscles, but my stubbon streak set in, there is no way I am asking to get a lift back!!!! So on we went, finally the home stretch was in sight, I stepped up the pace and finished with flying colours, but a gentleman I had been walking with for a lot of the walk had decided to sprint the last uphill part, my won't power came into play there, I will walk it!

After we had finished I found out that this gentleman was 73 years old, now that is what I really call “will” power. It shows no matter how old you are and whatever it is you want to achieve get your “will”power into gear and full speed ahead......